You may think what the big deal is about this simple number. But for me this number means a lot. That is a number for which I am incredibly grateful. That is a number I cannot believe I thought I could see. That is a number which makes me very emotional.
Five years ago, on January 31, 2017, I suffered a massive and an extremely rare genetic stroke (brain hemorrhage). It was a miracle that I survived, and I am extremely grateful and thankful for that. As a friend put it, I touched God and came back. God decided it was not yet my time to leave this beautiful planet of ours, so I survived. I keep telling myself there must be a reason I was saved; there must be a reason for this second lease on life. Only God knows. My loved ones and I can only speculate. I do not believe in organized religion or in any specific god.
But I do believe in a supreme power.
After the stroke, I was completely bed-ridden initially, I started an intense rehab regime supplemented by holistic treatments and therapies which helped me move from using a wheelchair, to a walker and to a cane now. I started doing basic activities which I could not do right after my stroke. And over these five years, I was also able to do some more day-day activities.
However, there are still a few activities listed below which I enjoyed a lot before the stroke which I am still not able to do after five years. I am not complaining – I am just noting the fact. I am just grateful that I am alive.
Drive a car
Go to a Washington Football Team or Washington Nationals game
Drink scotch
Wear contact lenses
Go to work
Play racquetball or tennis
Travel the world for sightseeing
Although I am still not able to do these activities, I am blessed to be able to do some others and have discovered some new ones such as:
Help people find the right opportunities or connections using my network
Listen to spiritual recordings
Practice Meditation
Do Journaling
Volunteer my time
Do Yoga
Write
Cook
Besides being able to do the above, I can see some silver linings in Sameer 2.0. I am much calmer and more patient than I was before. I have become more compassionate and empathetic and have a greater sense of gratitude. I am reinventing myself as a writer. And some aspects of the old me have not changed such as my ability to laugh at life.
Although my life changed forever that day, every morning when I wake up, I thank God that I am alive, I am breathing! Otherwise, it was all over for me five years ago - I was this close to death. I remind myself of this constantly. And that gives me strength to go on every day as I reinvent myself. No matter how difficult it is to face my new normal, I am taking my new normal on its own terms, with acceptance but also with hope.
And whether I can do any of the above activities or not, I intend to live life fully with this second lease on life and approach it with a spirit of gratitude and find ways to move forward.